Category Archive

Crazy. Busy. Week.

I want to crawl in a hole and hibernate and wake up about a year ago, but we’re drudging forward. We rounded out the craziness with a day at the 2nd International Babywearing Conference and some shopping with these fine ladies.

And then off to see David tattooing at Navy Pier. Not only is he in marathon tattoo mode, he’s practicing life as a jet setter as he hops on a plane this afternoon to fly to OH to see Tom Waits, only to come back on the first flight back after the show. Ahhh, the good life.

And now we’re off to have some fun and raise some money for these warriors (in pink). Xav wishes you all a very, um, contemplative day.

Girl and X photo’s by the amazing Crooked Eyebrow.

My baby is getting a little bloggy love today from the amazingly sweet Mamas at Mums the Wurd. Check it out, you might just be able to win yourself a sling while you’re over there.

Xavier and Grayson feeding the geese

I wish I had the photo of Gray’s Mama and I watching our boys, staring at their sweetness.

A week ends and the rest begins. Saturday is our Monday so we’re launching off into busy-ness as the rest of you sigh and settle down. It’s a holiday though, which means after today, David has some time off and we get some always cherished family time. I’m hoping for some rest somewhere amidst the go, go, go. Maybe, just maybe. Today I’ve a photo gig, at a gorgeous park, with friends, and X will be strapped to my back. And then we’re off to a benefit for this amazing family. The days ahead are filled with birthdays and barbeque’s and lets hope, lots of sun. We’ll be in and out and all around and most likely over here a bit too much.

Have a great holiday, weekend, whatever!

Speaking is not my thing. Well, to clarify, I can happily talk an ear off, but ask me to share my two cents in front of a group of people, grown people, grown important people and I’ll be in the corner shivering (I could totally rock it if my audience were say field mice or small children, just so you, you know, know) And so when I was invited to be a panel member for the Mommy Blogger Monologues my initial reaction was thanks, but no thanks. Not my thing.

Thankfully I thought about it a bit before sending in my gut response and realized that this IS EXACTLY my thing. I deal with PR folks and blogging relations daily with Mama Speaks, and with so much controversy in the blogosphere lately, regarding these relations, I realized that my not so humble opinions and I were being offered an opportunity to talk about something I am passionate about. I won’t say that I suddenly decided said opportunity was any less terrifying but I did decide to jump in. And I’m so glad I did.

I was honored to be one of nine amazing Mama’s who spent the morning talking about what we know best. Ourselves. Why we blog (and tweet!) and how this passion of ours has morphed into somewhat of an accidental career. Most importantly we were able to tell some amazing companies and PR folks the best ways to approach us (and you!). The best way to use us, to work together.

The morning was amazing. Successful. Thanks to Maria for the opportunity and all the other amazing Mamas; Arianne from To Think is To Create, Steph from Adventures in Babywearing, Jaymi from Flip Flop Mamma, Amy from The Ladybug and her Blogging Mama & Mums the Wurd, Kim from Traveling Mom, Emily from The Motherhood, Jory from Blogher and Pause and Julie (and little Oliver!) from Parents Blogger Network and Mothergoosemouse.

Happy Day Mama’s. This should be the moment that I gush over how amazing my mama has been to me, how amazing it is for me to be a mama (oh, my gawd, this is the coolest job evar! For. REAL.) but in this moment I feel more compelled to pass along my appreciation to all the other amazing Mama’s in my life. The women I learn from and lament to… You’re awesome. Enjoy your day. This mama thing wears you well.

XOXO.

I suck. But there were some amazing entries and there is even someone you might recognize in the running, so get on over and vote…

One of the highlights of my month is our Mama’s Night. Time out alone is a serious rarity for me, as such the occasion is met with ritualistic joy and anticipation. We usually go out to a restaurant or terrorize the mass of people who go to the Barnes and Noble cafe to read and get work done (seriously people, how dare you!) but we stepped it up this month and decided to par-tay with some help from RockBand at mi casa. (this is where I fight the urge to insert a slew of OMG’s!!!! and !!!!!)

What a blast! Food was great, friends were better. And um, we rock. So what if JenCat was the only one who could rock the drums and we got booed off stage a time or two. We had our moments of cohesive rockin’-ness. And then there was Steph realizing mid-My Sharona that “this song is dirty!”.

My hubby returned home with our  tot just as we were winding up and thankfully the little guy was content to jump right in (while the big guy got lost). I’m usually the first to head home on Mom’s Night, so I tackle the bedtime beast, so it was really nice to be able to enjoy the entire evening. And I mean entire evening, we were burning the midnight oil! I’m thinking the next RockBand night might need to be a slumber party.

Until then, Monkey Bread reigns supreme…. Thanks Steph, Arianne, Jaymi, JCon, Jen, and Robin for the fun.

Steph tagged me. I’m it. Read up. 7 things you’ll sleep better knowing about me….

1. Despite being veg for more than half my life I really love Bac-os. Your textured soy protein, artificially flavored, Red dye havin’, crunchy little bacon flavored pieces of goodness are welcome in my taters anytime.

2. I can turn my elbow to the wrong side of my arm. Pure genius, you HAVE to see it!

3. I heart Elton John. (and Crass)

4. I have texture based aversion to firm yet squishy foods. (tomatoes top the list)

5. I have a lucky freckle.

6. I have a new blog. (Because I need something else to do)

7. I really love this man.

I haven’t played along with one of these in a loooong time, but Steph posted a meme the other day that looked like too much fun to pass up…

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)
Buster Cooper

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)
Vanilla Oatmeal

3. YOUR “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name),
Aall

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal),
Black Sparrow

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, hospital where you were born),
Dyan Porter

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first),
Allas

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink),
The Green Chai

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers),
Kyle Elmer

9.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names ),
Jo Eugene

10. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter),
Turley Toledo

11. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower).
Autumn Daisy

12. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”)
Strawberry Skirty

13. HIPPIE NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree),
Blueberry Ash

14. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”),
The Photographic Sunshine

Ok. I think I might have to seriously consider some of those! Let me know if you decide to play along.

Actually we’ve been back for a week now. After four blissful day’s of vacation and little computer time, I realized how much I needed a break. So I took one. But now I’m lonely, I miss you all! I’ve been meaning to put together a bunch of photo’s from our trip, but haven’t had the time, so here’s just a sneak peak of X and Liam hanging out at the Nashville Zoo. (Isn’t Liam a doll? My goodness!)… and let the blogging commonsense*!

*I love spell check… this was supposed to say “commence” …. how we ended up with commonsense, well- I’m clueless… yet it seems oddly fitting somehow!

We’re flying down to Nashville for a few days to visit our dear friends Scott and Carol and baby Liam. A much needed getaway. If you’re looking for something do to, Steph’s “You Blog My Blog” is still going strong. Ciao!

Better late than never! Steph’s photo tag this week is all about bags (to go with our shoes of course) My favorite bag of late is this skull bag my friend Carol sent for my birthday. I love it and it’s big enough to hold all of me and Xavier’s stuff for a day out and about. And as Steph revealed bags will be available soon from Nest in all of my current patterns.

There is such a wide range of ‘normal’ when it comes to families… I’m curious what normal is for you. Let me know in the comments or feel free to post on your blog. The questions…

1. How old were you when you got married?
2. How long did you wait to have your first child?
3. How old were you when you had your first child?
4. If you have multiple children, how long did you wait in between?
5. At what age did your baby wean or when do you plan to wean?
6. When did your baby take their first steps?
7. When did you begin to toilet train?
8. At what age did you declare potty competency?
9. At what age do family baths/nudity/etc. get a little creepy?
10. Any questions you’re itching to ask?

My dearest Stephanie, had the brilliant idea to focus this week’s photo tag on our baby bumps… Here is my favorite pregnant photo

We were in Rome. San Pietro I believe. David and I and our baby to be finally taking our dream honeymoon.

I was 6 1/2 months pregnant and unfortunately this is about as big as my belly was able to get. I know these here photo tags are supposed to be sunny, and I’ll try my best not to cloud up the parade too much, but this is a tough one for me…

One of the hardest parts of having a preemie is the loss of your pregnancy. Obviously your immediate focus is on the health and care of your baby. But when the dust settles you are left feeling a bit incomplete. Not many understand. Your baby was the point of that belly after all, so what’s the big deal? But it is difficult. Even on a biological level you are supposed to be pregnant for 9 months, my body, my mind was disrupted and confused. I delivered at 28 weeks, 1 day. I missed out on 12 weeks of pregnancy. My entire 3rd trimester. To this day I cringe when I hear a woman, 30 some weeks pregnant complain about how miserable and huge and uncomfortable she is, how much she wishes her baby would just come out already. I grieve what she takes for granted.

We know we want more children, and although I really know we’re not ready I have to consistently fight the want to be pregnant again. I loved every moment of being pregnant, I felt so comfortable, so beautiful. I look forward to someday completing a pregnancy. To loose sight of my toes, experience swollen ankles and have my belly button turn itself inside out seems heavenly… and at the same time, if I could manipulate history I wouldn’t change a thing.

Seriously, close your eye’s and point to where your mind is (which part of your body contains your mind…). I obviously can’t see you so let me know (and no changing your answer after you see other responses!)… I’ll elaborate soon!

Stephanie started this fun photo tag…. Since we’re mostly Mama’s why not see the women behind us all.

Here’s my whole family actually from looong ago. No clue where we are, but it looks like somewhere fun - my dad, little me (wasn’t I cute?!), my beautiful mom and my brother, Eric. I’ve always been told I look like my Dad but the older I get, looking back at pictures of my mom at my age, I see such similarity!

We’ve been through so much and still struggle at times, but she’s my mama and I love her…

So…. I normally don’t show off my tattoo’s, especially those that are normally covered by clothing. But… Mamamilkers started a tattoo meme and I excitedly said I’d participate, sooo here in all my glory are (really awful) photo’s of me tattoos (hey, it’s really hard to photograph your own body parts!) and some explanations…

The “shooting star” was my first tattoo. Age 16. Hey, at least I didn’t get barbed wire. I’ll have to say after surviving two laparoscopic surgeries and pregnancy it’s not so bad.

The kanji was tattoo three and four. Age 19. The story a bit more personal- I’ll spare the details but it involved one of said emergency laparoscopic surgery’s and the confusion that followed.

I, ahem, “lovingly” refer to this one as the demon. Tattoo numero two. Age 17. (yes, that’s why you’re supposed to wait until you’re 18!) It’s huge. On my back between my shoulder blades. I really wanted a fairy. So I went to a “friend” who was apprenticing and he came up with this. All punk rock at the time I figured what the heck. Turns out he didn’t even come up with it himself, but hey what can you do… I really want a tree back piece (my entire back), so as soon as I can find a soul brave enough to attempt covering this up or afford laser removal this beast is G-O-N-E.

Last but not least is (most of) my half sleeve… I love this one. Tattoo number five. Age 22.

And hubby should be getting started on my ‘Our Lady of La Leche’ sleeve sometime soon!

For nearly 13 months Xavier has been by my side (on my side is probably a more accurate description). And with the exception of the necessities in the NICU I have not left him. At all. With anybody. Not even his Papa (who is, I might mention, a wonderful Papa).

Partially out of philosophy (I just don’t think someone else should watch my child), part necessity (nursing) and a whole lot of desire (why would I want to be without him for a second!) … And I have loved, without reservation, every second.

I spent a lot of my life moving through awkwardness. I was shy, self-conscious, never quite fit in - which was ok because fitting in wasn’t necessarily my style - but I felt strange in my skin none the less. Since becoming a mom, however, I’ve found my purpose. This is my calling. This is what I’m here for. And all at once I have transitioned into this woman who is comfortable in her skin. Confident. Focused. At ease.

And so, since becoming a mother - Xavier’s mother - I have found no desire to ‘take a break’ or have ‘me’ time. This is all I want to do. I have embraced it. We ‘ve centered things around our new family, child-focused and molded the rest of life around. But…

I’m going to start teaching yoga classes within the next month and while I’ll only be away for an hour or two once a week, I started to think it probably wasn’t a good idea to wait until my first class to leave Xavier for the first time…I decided to see if Stephanie would like to go out for her birthday. Just the two of us. Babies at home with our darling husbands. Just her and I for soup and sandwiches and lots of chatting at Panera. Close to home but still away. Did I mention no babies?

So around 5:45 this evening I made the rounds with kisses, said ‘See you later’, and walked down the stairs to the car for the first time in a year - by myself. I felt naked. I felt nervous. I cried pulling out the driveway. But then something wonderful happened. I felt great. Relaxed, peaceful, proud. David and Xavier were going to be fine and I was off to have a great time with my best friend. And we did.

I picked up Steph, we headed to Panera, ordered our meals, placed our cell phones on the table and got lost in good food and great conversation for an hour or so. We trekked over to Target to pick up a few things (did you know they make sleds for babies? Yes, we’re praying for snow) and then we headed back home. To our husbands and babes and boys. A simple night, but wonderful.

I came home to a house still standing. A house happy. Toys all over the place. David and Xavier being silly upstairs, still sparkling from the bath. I shouted I was home, climbed the stairs. As I peeked around the corner Xavier got all kinds of excited - began to crawl towards me and smile. The kind of smile that says “I’m really glad to see you, but it was kind of nice not to see you for a while.” And after some thought I’ve decided that is a wonderful thing.

Sure I missed some things. X learned how to say pig and oink while I was gone. But I gained a lot. I feel refreshed, have a spring in my step I didn’t know I was missing. Bonded with my buddy in a way we haven’t yet, we’re like sisters - separated at birth, but since we’ve met we’ve always spent time together focused on our little one’s. And probably, best of all, my boys spent time together. Just the two of them. Being boys. No girls allowed.